Yes. Both styles. But my roommate will kill me if I do it in the house while she is here.
Mom, there's that news van again!
The autumn colors are coming in.
Damp & grey, but decently warm morning.
Oatmeal. With real maple syrup.
So I stop at the CVS in Central Square in Cambridge, MA. Work is a block (or two, depending on your math & map) from the square. I find where they stock the Quaker Chewy Variety Pack & grab a box. I bring it up to the front where the self checkout machines are located.
Which is where & when the fun started.
The computer refuses to sell me the box. It scans fine, but then tells me "You can not make this purchase at this time." Repeatedly. So I summon the attendant.
He comes over, sees the problem, and tries to override the computer. The computer, however, is smarter than he is, ad he can't figure out how to allow the sale. So after a few tries he asks me to go to the counter, and he'll have someone ring me up there. So over I go.
I wait a few minutes, and up comes the cashier. He yells at the attendant because he had to come from the back for one item, then goes to ring me up.
Only the computer was smarter than him, too. He couldn't figure out how to tell the register it was OK to sell me a box of granola bars. After five minutes of him trying to outsmart a machine, he gave up.
And told me he wasn't allowed to sell the box after 10pm.
When I finished laughing at him, I asked him to confirm that. Nope, it's too late for him to sell me the box. I stared at him a bit, then walked out.
On the other side of Mass Ave is a Walgreens. I walked over there - mid-block - and went straight to where they had the granola bars. Grabbed a box. Went to the register. *Bleep* Sale went right through. Gave them my money, took my granola bars to work. Finally.
I find myself wondering how many other things CVS can't sell after 10pm, considering it's open 24 hours.
What's the most insane shopping experience that you've ever had?
Early one Saturday morning, two young boys - Jason, 7 & Harry, 5 - were talking. Jason was telling his younger brother about the curse words he had heard at school the previous day. Neither boy was sure what the two words meant, but knew that they would have to use them to be considered Big Boys.
"Boys, come down for breakfast!" their mother called. The two boys looked at each other and swiftly swore a pact. Jason would use the word "fuck" at breakfast, and Harry would use the word "ass" thereafter. Then they would be Big Boys.
The two lads scurried down to the kitchen where their mother had assembled eggs, bacon & toast, even warming up the waffle iron. The two boys took their traditional seats at the table. Mom smiled at her two young men and asked "what would you guys like for breakfast today? Your choice!"
Harry looked at Jason, and Jason looked back. Then Jason turned to his mother and said "well, fuck, I would like Cheerios for breakfast."
Without missing a beat, mom backhanded Jason so he flew out of the chair to the floor. More shocked than truly hurt, he popped up to his feet and saw anger and pain in his mother's eyes. Jason burst into tears and ran from the kitchen, not stopping until his was buried under he covers of his bed.
Mom slowly turned to Harry, who was wide-eyed and shaking in his chair. With ice in her voice, she asked her youngest son "and what do YOU want for breakfast?"
Harry, no fool he, promptly decided he understood he was being tested, to see if he had learned a lesson here. And he had. Trembling, Harry replied "you can bet your ass it's not Cheerios!"
